I love my apartment (except for the paper-thin walls) but I haaaaate the location. The neighborhood is full of bars and it’s impossible to park and the cops are all over on the weekends because parts of it are mad sketchy, plus everyone else in my program lives way on the other side of town, so everything everyone does is far away, which preeeetty much exiles me out here alone. The last thing I want when I’m crazed and busy with school for eighty-plus hours a week is for what little socializing I can do to be an inconvenience.

Anyway. I met a bunch of grad school people tonight in a small, hot, very crowded, and very drunk apartment (yes an apartment can be drunk, if you put enough drunk people in it). It was nice. Overwhelming.

Tipsy rant: I have no idea what’s going on or what I’m doing or if I’m doing anything right or if I made a horribly wrong decision somewhere along the way and I’m going to spend two years miserable and getting into more debt and living in an unparkable shithole, or if this is okay and it’s just hard and everything’s going to be alright once I’m used to it. It would be nice if there was some way to know. Fuckin’ life. Bein’ all inscrutable.